Living in the ROK is pleasant. The people are exceedingly civil and well-mannered.

 

Sometime in the not too distant past, with a bounce in my step, I abandoned my previous prevarications of wandering too far astray from the neighborhood on my day of rest and set forth on an adventure, a first time journey to the shopping mecca of Myungdong. Enticed by a friend's descriptive declaration as 'a must see,' I agreed to tag along. After spending most Sundays in my small studio apartment with the blinds down, it felt rejuvenating to be out and about in the fine spring sun. We hailed a cab.

 

A few hours of being an appendage of a human centipede was enough. We managed to break free from the crowd and wandered on the fringe in search of sustenance. As the area caters to Japanese tourists, there was a infinite choice of Japanese restaurants serving the same bland assortment of food. We choose one with a patio. After briefly perusing the menu, we both ordered the sampler cutlet dish, offering the full array of deep fried fish, foul, and meat with batter, salad, and rice.

 

As I was telling my friend that Myungdong was indeed memorable, the quiet of the restaurant was unexpectedly invaded by the screeching of tires and the expected grating and bending of metal and plastic. Transfixed, we watched as the drivers opened their doors and stepped out of their respective vehicles. Inspecting the damage, they started to gesture and gesticulate, all the while speaking in brisk Korean. I am uncertain as to what or why the argument suddenly escalated, but suddenly the duo of voices began an un-relentless volley of cursing. I will try to recollect to the best of my ability the exact harangue of expletives issued by each adversary, in this, an example of the astonishing civility of Koreans.

 

A: "Thou should know when thou hast made a mistake. Apologize!"

B: "What? Thou must be joking? Clearly, the accident was thy fault. How is
it possible to even fathom that I should apologize to thee. Thou must be
blind!"

A:  "Thou art an 18 man!"

B:  "What hast thou said. Mine ears have failed me."

A:  "Thou art a 10 man!"

B:  "Thou hast gone too far, thou son of dog!"

A:  "Thou art a son of a ______ (list of farm animals)!"

B:  "Thou art an unlucky 18 dog. Shut thy mouth!"

 

That's enough as I don't want to offend the young readership, but I think you get the point. However, did you notice the strict adherence to Korean standards of propriety. Truly it is fascinating how Koreans, while screaming and turning red in the face, continue to address each other in the formal. The incongruity of the situation; swearing while being proper, the antithesis of being vehement and well-mannered at the same time. What a wonderful world of contradictions. Koreans really do know how to be civil, even under the greatest duress.